justsomeantifas:
“ go choke on your paycheck sally
while people literally fucking choke and die because they can’t afford a goddamn epipen.
”

gluten-free-pussy:

gluten-free-pussy:

When I was 16-19 I worked as a hostess/parking lot attendant at a funeral home and my boss told me (and I quote) “you get a friends and family discount but once you quit you won’t get it anymore so make sure you use it.” And to this day nothing has ever been funnier to me

A week after I got the job I accidentally spilled someone’s ashes on myself and my manager told me not to worry about it because they had spare ashes in the back room


catsuggest:

catsuggest:

how to hydrate for summer

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yes

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excellont choice

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correct

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good

two common mistake:

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no water in bowl

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tree


hot-and-cold-mess:

When I get caught staring at lesbian couples in public

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ginger-ale-official:

updogonline:

ginger-ale-official:

updogonline:

me walking into the grocery store to buy everything bagels

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Hohoho! I like this post! If I made it i would have written ginger ale instead of everything bagels but that’s fine that you wanted to make a post about bagels instead of ginger ale this time around I get it

me going back to the grocery store because i forgot ginger ale

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Hohoho! What a great post friend! I love the part about ginger ale!!!


azyin:

im horny but like horny to cuddle


cobaltdays:

quisps:

deer are horse if they were twinks

why does this make sense,,.?,.????

I like clingy girls

touchmykittykat:

I like when they text me good morning or call me. Check up on me all the time. I actually don’t find that annoying. I don’t get how you couldn’t like that. Someone constantly wanting to talk to you and show you affection. I love it when someone does that. That keeps me happy and it will keep me from leaving. It shows that you are thinking about me.